Archive for November, 2008
Jesse’s Girl part II
Dear Jesse’s Girl,
Hi, it’s me again. I hope your head is ok, that was a tremendous spill you took after you finished that drink I made for you. If you noticed your underwear missing when you regained consciousness, I have no idea what might have caused that but the same thing happened to me. I [...]
21Nov2008 | Fortey | 1 comment | ContinuedScenic Anemia Investigates: Jazz Music’s Tragic “72″ Club
Most everyone familiar with classic rock is familiar with the notorious “27″ club, the ever growing group of famous (or famous-ish, in some cases) musicians who met an untimely death at the age of 27. Kurt Cobain, Jimi Hendrix, Jim Morrison, Robert Johnson. The list reads like a who’s-who of Rock and Roll Hall of [...]
12Nov2008 | Adam | 4 comments | ContinuedLearn To Be the President!
During the long presidential campaign, the question of Obama’s seeming lack of experience was the issue that he had to address over and over again. It was a valid question, but he handled it with no problem. I can only assume that his calm demeanor was due at least in some part to knowing that, [...]
10Nov2008 | Adam | 0 comments | Continued
Ways to Fight Strangers
You may not know this, but the world hates you. And by you, I really mean you, reading this right now. Not “you” like everyone, like as if I said “You can’t masturbate on the bus without unwelcome consequences” or whatever in which I’d be using you to mean all of us, like the French [...]
8Nov2008 | Fortey | 3 comments | ContinuedKirk and Mark Get the Axe: Who Should We Take Out Next?
Some of you may remember the Kirk and Mark Show debacle of days gone by. If not, this link will refresh your memory. If you’re too awesome to click a link, let me summarize.
A few months back, I wrote an article for Cracked about the world’s worst ways to get drunk. A few days later, [...]
Judge’s Dating Video
If you’re a longtime fan of scenicanemia, then you’re full of shit. But if you ever checked the site before the big blackout of ‘08, which occurred when Adam fell asleep while touching himself during site maintenance and deleted everything, and by touching himself I mean a fisting mitten was involved, then you may recall [...]
5Nov2008 | Fortey | 0 comments | Continued
The Halloween Bus
Because I enjoy spending time with the common man and stewing in the smell of tepid urine, I often take the bus to work. For those interested, tepid urine is far more robust than fresh urine. Leave some in a glass on the nightstand sometime and you’ll see.
Whiz talk aside, I’ve grown accustomed to not [...]
ScenicAnemia’s Guide to Election Day ‘08
After what felt like a solid six years of campaign ads, debates, and completely unimportant “scandals,” the day is finally upon us. Today, barring contested results and lengthy legal disputes, we will elect a new president. This is, without question, one of the most important elections in our nation’s young history. We here at ScenicAnemia [...]
3Nov2008 | Adam | 3 comments | ContinuedFinancial Whoa
So, the other day I received a phone call from a girl I went to school with. A hot Asian chick who actually thought I was an alright guy. We never dated or anything, but we got along really well. I always had that “what if” thought when my mind would wander back to her [...]
2Nov2008 | Adam | 0 comments | Continued